Why You Should Always Write In Your Own Voice

how to write in your own voice

I’ve tried to write this blog post several times today. Each time I start typing, I feel this inner restlessness broiling up inside of me and my head starts hurting and I can’t decide if I need a diet coke or to just take a break.

What should I say next? What direction am I moving in? How is this going to be in-line with my original purpose for This Girl Thrives?

What if people hate me?!

These questions have been whirling around my head at a thousand miles an hour. It’s like being at a hurdle that I just can’t hurl myself over.

Last week hit me hard.

I wrote a blog post that wasn’t in my own voice; that didn’t reflect me, my opinions, or my values.

It was meaningless, nonsensical bullshit that I wrote for the sole purpose of getting hits and traffic.

Not that I was being deliberately controversial by any means, in fact, my intention was to be the opposite.

But I’m going to tell you in on a blogger’s worst kept secret, Internet.

Nothing says a good recipe for traffic and instant shares like a good old listicle.


Don’t get me wrong, I love to occasionally entertain the brain-cell destroying past time that is reading a Buzzfeed article. But I agreed with Sabina when she questioned if Buzzfeed has ruined blogging.

The thing is, it’s so much easier to bring in page views with some memes and silliness than it is to sit down, open up and say something real.

In the world of monetization, sponsored posts and viral Facebook shares, taking the shortcut and writing a listicle is incredibly tempting.

As bloggers, we fear that our audiences don’t really have the time to connect.

The result is cheapening our stories and underselling ourselves into bite-sized chunks that readers spew out as quickly as they digest.

The listicle version of this story would be, 1) I took the shortcut and it massively backfired.

But actually, I have so, so much more I want to say than that.

Besides the obvious fact that I should’ve hit “block” and “disable comments“, I actually learnt a lot from that experience.

I learnt that whilst women have the opportunity to be each other’s biggest cheerleaders, too often, they choose to be each other’s worst enemies.

I learnt that expending energy on drama will do little else besides leaching your energy and making you feel pretty crappy.

After all, if you buy tickets to the circus, you can’t act surprised when you see elephants.

Elephant metaphors aside, what I’m trying to say is that I need to start writing in my own god damn voice.

When I was interning, after 8 hours of writing click-bait about Miley Cyrus’ dead dog, I would unzip my bullshit suit, open my laptop and unleash the ugly realness that was my actual voice here on my blog.

Somehow, I messed that up for the sake of a few thousand hits.

What I’m trying to say is, as bloggers, writers, journalists, WHATEVER, we need to write in our own voices. We need to stop underselling ourselves from fear that people won’t engage or think that we’re of value. Because your real voice IS of value – it’s what separates you from everybody else, it’s your “USP” and the most original thing that you have to offer.

So will I ever write a listicle again? Probably. If it’s the right format for my post and doesn’t compromise the quality of what I have to say.

But what I do intend to do a lot more of is trusting in myself and in my audience. I want to write high quality content that I am proud to put my name to. I want to write content that reflects my writing and shows what I can do. I want to tell stories, go on adventures and to take this blog with me.


  1. Being disingenuous will be obvious to your readers and as I experienced, massively backfire.

    Think of your favourite bloggers – why do you connect with them? For me, it’s because of how they write. They start to feel like my “friends” and I trust what they have to say. After all, if they were underselling themselves, why would I trust anything they had to “sell”? From a beauty product to a hotel recommendation, their voice would immediately lose value. We should strive to be genuine, always.

  2. It will allow you tell your story.

    Rather than cheapening and compromising your content, tell it how you want to tell it rather than what you think people will enjoy reading. When you let your own voice come through, you will find that the words spill out on the page in a much more fluid and engaging way.

  3. Because only you can write like you.

    Okay, a little bit corny, but this last one is important. There is already so much run-of-the-mill content online. Rather than greying into the background, be yourself and bring something new to the table.

Have you ever had an experience where something you wrote backfired? Do you write in your own voice? Tell me in the comments!

Lydia Rose,




  1. I super agree with you! Listicles are great to click on and great to the catch the attention, but ultimately, I continue reading a blog because I like the writer behind it. It’s different. I started reading blogs many years ago to get a glimpse of what someone else’s life is like. I still read many of these bloggers today. But now, all I see online is listicle after listicle, it gets boring after a while.

    Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog

  2. May 16, 2017 / 10:02 am

    My brother recently cautioned me about writing with a “fake, lonely planet facade”, so can completely relate!!

  3. May 16, 2017 / 11:40 am

    This! Thank you! And thank you! And thank you again!

    I started blogging a few months ago and I was always stressed about “my voice”. I feel (to this day) insecure about sharing my own thoughts, feelings- I would just write the way I thought people would enjoy it. But that’s just not me. And it’s even harder to find my own voice as I’m not a native English speaker.

    I’m not agains listicles, if they are truly suitable for your post- however we should find a balance between things.

    You are so right! Loved every word of this article 🙂

  4. Natalie
    May 16, 2017 / 11:54 am

    I like to read your listicles sometimes too. It’s fun and easy to understand (I also love your other content of course). So I am happy to see you saying that you would probably still write listicles sometimes

  5. Chloe
    May 16, 2017 / 12:35 pm

    Completely agree with this. I was second guessing myself if I should post an article because it doesn’t align with mainstream views, but I think I will post it now. Thanks

  6. May 16, 2017 / 5:12 pm

    Nice written post! So true… it is hard to have a hope in blogging these days, as you said, all those buzzfeeds, and other kinds of ‘viral crap’ (sorry for language) is literally making people ignorant to a good read. However, it’s up to us bloggers, to bring up our voice, opinions and words to stand up against this and maintain the standard to bring some value to this world ✌️

  7. May 16, 2017 / 6:03 pm

    I’m so struggling to find my voice and find a balance – so this post really resonated with me! Personally, I really enjoyed your listicle, but wow – the backlash – so unnecessary!! Some people really need to calm down! 🙂

  8. May 16, 2017 / 6:30 pm

    Really great post, inspiring , enjoy of every paragraph , you totally right, there is nothing like our internal voice. Follow your own way, and be confident.

  9. May 16, 2017 / 8:08 pm

    I soooo agree. I also find it super hard to write when I’m not being genuine. Kudos for saying it like it is xx

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